The Adventures of Kidney Boy

A Journal About Living With End Stage Renal Disease. Dialysis. Transplants. Love. Family. Friends. The Unsung Donor. This is my life, from the end of a needle to the bottom of a pill bottle.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Your request is denied.

Well, today we got the disheartening news:  there's too much protein in my father-in-law's urine, and they won't allow him to donate a kidney to me.

It seems like this is hard for some people to wrap their minds around.  I got a lot of "Yeah, but I thought he was a match?".

He is.  He is a match - however, there's other factors - like the potential health risks to the donor - that have to be considered.  Too much protein may suggest compromised kidney function on his part, so donating may put his health at risk. 

And it's heartbreaking.  Not just for me - don't get me wrong, I'm sad about this, but I'm used to failure and disapointment.   You're talking to a dude who lost his kidneys at age 24 - I've been alive seven years after that, and I've learned that the world will just crap on you sometimes.  Like, take the biggest, most awful dump you've ever seen - right on your head.  It will crush your hopes and dreams without even offering a courtesy wipe.  I've been there before.  I'm used to it.  I pick myself up, and keep moving forward.

But I know how much this upsets my family, and that breaks my heart.  My Father-in-Law worked so hard to be able to donate to me - and now this.  I don't want him to feel his work is in vain, because I couldn't make it without the love and support of my family.  My parents have been amazing through all of this, and my in-laws took me in as one of their own, and have loved me so honestly since I have been with their daughter - that's worth more than all the gold in the world.

I'm trying to keep a tough front, and I'm trying not to scream - but I am human, and I am so sorely disapointed.  But I will keep moving on, and we will find a way to get me a transplant - and get me a better life.

Thanks for listening.

~Steve

3 comments:

  1. Aw man...so sorry, Steve. You've got my prayers on your side (and I'm rarely the praying type.)

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